It’s not bad…it’s Monday

“There are people whom one loves immediately and forever. Even to know they are alive in the world is quite enough.” – Nancy Spain

This past Christmas, my mom bought me this journal. Every week it has a picture of some sort of art work along with a quote. This week’s quote really struck a nerve for me. I blame Fringe. I don’t remember the quote from the show, but even if I did I wouldn’t write it here. Spoilers and all. But basically, Fringe is about a man breaking the universes in order to save his son.

It happened suddenly on Friday. I have been watching Fringe in order to distract myself from Chuck. It is interesting, but I wasn’t emotionally attached to the characters. I could watch and enjoy, but from afar. It was safe. Friday as I watched, I am not sure exactly when it happened. I rented two movies during my lunch break to watch that night. When I got home, I decided to watch Fringe while I ate dinner. After one episode stopped, I started another. Then another. Suddenly I am six episodes into season three and my eyes are burning. I had gotten up at three in the morning that day.

I know what episode it was. It was The Man from the Other Side. Followed by Brown Betty. And now I am emotionally invested. Which isn’t what I wanted…what I needed. Because look…. favorite

Look at the feels that I will soon have…I am not sure what episode this is in, but I am already not prepared. I need to stay off the internet and stop looking at photos and giving myself spoilers. There are five seasons of this show. And I am somewhere near the beginning of four. Meaning I don’t have that much left because I binge watched season three over the past weekend. I would be further along, but I went and saw San Andreas again at the dollar theater. Partly to keep myself from watching Fringe all day. Partly because I wanted popcorn.

I like the idea of a parallel universe with different versions of ourselves. I like the concept of a same yet different version of myself. Where would I be now if I had made a different choice or taken a different road? Maybe in this different universe some things didn’t happen.

I have to stop myself from falling into that rabbit hole.

In order to keep myself from my own thoughts, I will continue to watch Fringe tonight. I am sure this show will leave me broken in a puddle of my own tears.

But it will be worth it.

Because the best things are worth it.

I hope.

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